Just some Amy-truth, I look forward every year to creating our holiday card, choosing the layout and the photos, making sure each kid’s personality shines through, updating the mailing list with new friends and addresses, getting the holiday stamps, and, finally, sitting down in the evening with a glass of wine and Christmas carols playing (the BEST part, girlfriends!) to sign, stuff and stamp! What a joy … and sister, I am not alone.
Americans purchase approximately 1.6 BILLION holiday cards a year… is this just another commercialized social competition, or something more?
Curious about this annual tradition, I came across a fascinating article by Ellen F. Brown, which shed some light on this holiday ritual. For centuries various cultures have exchanged written New Year’s greetings, and old kings sent out their heralds at “yuletide.” But the English-speaking tradition of sending holiday cards only began in the mid-1800’s.
Brown goes on to share Yale anthropologist Micaela diLeonardo’s insight that the age of industrialization, and the “demise of the family farm,” caused families to spread out geographically. Apparently it fell to the women to do “the work of kinship,” becoming “caretakers” of these scattered family networks. And ye old Christmas card was an easy way for them to nurture relationships among their children who moved away, and faraway relatives and friends from childhood.
In the U.S., sending holiday cards became even more popular when it evolved into a charitable activity. By the 1940s, many non-profits conducted fundraisers at Christmas by selling sets of cards with their logo or an image representing their mission. I fondly remember the UNICEF and March of Dimes greeting card fundraisers when I was a little girl, seeing them arrive at my grandmother Mimi’s house after she faithfully ordered them, year after year.
Ms. Brown concludes that ultimately, with the prevalence of social media and ease of digital messaging, it will be up to the next generation of young people as to whether the holiday card tradition survives. Personally, I hope that it does …. I love looking through the cards in my hands, shifting from family photo to photo, news update to update … but then again, I’m still one who loves to go out to the mailbox and get the mail.There could be something exiting! A long ago voice from the past! Maybe a refund check, or a winning sweepstakes letter from Publisher’s Clearinghouse, LOL! And in December, always, I’m looking for those rectangles that bear greetings from friends and family, around the world and straight into my heart.
According to a study, a recent push for women to “break free” of the responsibility to participate in sending holiday cards didn’t actually make them happier. In fact, some felt guilty for not keeping in touch or felt like they had to defend their decision not to participate. Now that’s the opposite of the point of holiday cards, I’d say! If they make you happy, send ‘em … if it causes more stress and grief, then give yourself a break! Holiday cards should absolutely, positively, be a “no judgement” zone.
No doubt, there is the “nay-sayer crowd” — using tons and tons of paper is a waste, unhealthy competition that shows off just the right image, or spending money that could be put to better use. Maybe. But just maybe, instead, consider the positives: there are lots of websites that make it super easy to print lots of cards easily customized with family photos, names and updates. Some can even let you upload a mailing list and address and mail the cards for you! Or get the whole family involved and teach those kiddos how to address an envelope (now THAT is a skill that is fading fast, folks!) and share some cheer.
For me, it’s more than checking off a holiday “To Do” item … it’s the heartfelt exchange of greetings of love. I look forwardwith great eagerness to seeing the smiling faces of my friends and family, some of whom I don’t connect with often. I feel the abundance of love in my life, and the richness of friendships. And most of all, I feel downright lucky to have had another year of life on this planet, and ready to celebrate new times ahead.
So, from one girlfriend to another, it’s not a competition or a chore. And it’s way more than #blessed or #thankful … this thoughtful endeavor is about sitting down and thinking about each person in my life. Those who make this world more fulfilling, more beautiful, more amazing. It grounds me, in that moment, and I carry it with me into the new year.
Gotta go … the holiday cards, gift-wrapping and Santa Claus wishes are awaiting!
Read Ellen F. Brown’s article here.
… and enjoy the season!